@FamousPlewa #HashtagHorror

REGALSAYS:Been a long time since I watched a Halloween movie (Don’t get me started on the bastardised Rob Zombie redneck remakes) but this brought back fine memories of Arrive, Slash, Leave for a horror movie (Despite the stereotype characters and Busta Ryhmes) this is the sorta thing we love to recap at Hashtag Horror. Point out the flaws, cliches etc. 

Long story short… 2 stars out of 4.

 

Onward and upward through horror movies galore, this Saturday’s being Halloween: Resurrection. The great thing about doing a slasher flick: you can at least make fun of the stupidity of some people.

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Ah Busta Rhymes. Headliner of many a horror movie.

@KristoffrableIs it just me or does Miramax delight in making shitty movies?#HashtagHorror

@JoeBewickCreepy doll…. we’re on the ball! #HorrorMovieCliches#HashtagHorror

@MrsZigglesworth What doctor in THEIR right mind would let Michael Myers out?#HashtagHorror

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror My eyes are glazing over already.

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror This is what happens when you are subjected to Hagan and TNA. The looney bin for you.

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror That doll’s about to OD.

@MrsZigglesworth Security really doesn’t get the salary they deserve in this town.#HashtagHorror

@JoeBewick Police officer eating a Twinkie, we’re all for the cliches tonight...#HashtagHorror

@Kristoffrable Wow, that vending machine looks old, time for an upgrade, you can do that like cell phones right? #HashtagHorror

@Kristoffrable Yeah cuz I’m pretty sure you die that quickly when you slash a dudes throat…this movie is so accurate! #HashtagHorror

@JoeBewick NO! NOT JOHN WAYNE GACY! Oh, wait… #HashtagHorror

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror Is it standard procedure to begin a search by making sure the laundry is okay?

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Run, Bitch, RUNNN!

@Jasmine_Galan Well that’s not how you open a door #HashtagHorror

 

Fifteen minutes into the movie and Laurie Strode, Jamie Lee Curtis, is dead. Unfortunately, unlike Michael Myers, she does not come back from the dead to save this movie. She’s dead and gone. Oh, look, it’s finally the title screen. Time to get to the part that’s the actual movie. That they had to spend fifteen minutes to kill off Curtis tells you they don’t have much planned for this slightly less than an hour and a half movie.

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror The end.

@MrsZigglesworth Remind your children not to go to Haddonfield University.#HashtagHorror

@JoeBewick So…it’s like Big Brother? Fuck… #HashtagHorror

@Jasmine_Galan She’s in college, he’s in high school. Well that’s realistic#HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Someone call Howard Wolowitz and tell him this bitch has his scooter.

@Kristoffrable Oh shit, Busta Rhymes, I remember when I used to avoid his music like the plague. #HashtagHorror

@BrooklynBrawla this kid is a douchebag. its amplified by a thousand times due to da french dubbing. #HashtagHorror

@MrsZigglesworth Tyra is secretly criticizing everyone’s body now. #HashtagHorror

@Jasmine_Galan To be in a horror film the only quality you need is the ability to scream like a maniac for the smallest reasons #HashtagHorror

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror How long until the wuss from American Pie pisses himself?

@Kristoffrable Collects human skin, so that’s what the kids do these days. I was lame back in the day, never did cool shit like that. #HashtagHorror

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror I’m siding with the boring murderer. These people suck.

 

Thirty minutes in and we are about to get our next murder victim. The story so far? Oh, who cares, there really isn’t much of one. Go into a house. Get recorded. Get scared. Die.

@JoeBewick AHHH LOUD NOISE! #HashtagHorror

@BrooklynBrawla whats da fascination wit murder houses in murder movies? you know whats going to happen. #HashtagHorror

@Kristoffrable Not a house you put on the market? People live in the Amityville house still today. Jeez, accuracy please. #HashtagHorror

@TheSupremeForce #HashtagHorror I could be jobbing Brodus Clay to Heath Slater in EWR right now.

@MrsZigglesworth No electricity. No running water, but there is a drawer full of butcher knives. #HashtagHorror

@Kristoffrable It’s the key to her chastity belt, followed up by let’s poke around a bit…I’m on the floor laughing! Best Lines Ever! #HashtagHorror

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror So, this is basically Real World: Murder Victims.

@JoeBewick Anyone seen any doggies yet? #HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa #HashtagHorror I’m sure websites like that in 2002 could run up to 4 streams with no lag.

@BrooklynBrawla michael myers denied boobs? someone’s gettin stabbed.#HashtagHorror

@Kristoffrable Pretty sure that if they want to make another of these they can get Johnny Curtis for this role. #HashtagHorror

 

45 minutes in and we realize that Tyra Banks’ character is actually very bad at her job. She hasn’t noticed anything so far, or even questioned why she hasn’t spoken to the man who set up the cameras earlier in the movie that died at the half an hour mark.

@Kristoffrable AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#HashtagHorror

@Jasmine_Galan There’s always gotta be that one who just corrects EVERYTHING#Smartass #HashtagHorror

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror Kill him again.

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Yeah cos there is always holes behind mirrors.

@MrsZigglesworth It’s going really well. When Tyra’s doing the editing, two people have already died. REALLY well! #HashtagHorror

@Kristoffrable Judging by the costumes at this Halloween party, it’s pretty lame.#HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa #HashtagHorror The fuck did he punch a hole through the door when it wasn’t locked?

@JoeBewick ‘Stab the doll where he touched you…’ #HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Bill is dead. He got stabbed in the head. #KillBill#HashtagHorror

@BrooklynBrawla literally waiting for a unannounced kane vs mankind match to break out. #HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Obligatory tit shot! As said by Randy Meeks.

@FamousPlewa #HashtagHorror Now we know where WWE creative got the dual Sin Cara angle idea from.

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror The guy in the mask is as easy to understand as Titus O’Neil.

@Kristoffrable Damn dude, you had a chick with some modest boobs in a torture room and you didn’t keep going. Get laid much? #HashtagHorror

@Jasmine_Galan Yes of course go into the scary hole in the wall #HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa  #HashtagHorror Sure. No electricity in the house… But the basement she’s in has the light on.

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror We call that a… ratings spike.

 

One hour into the movie and with less than a half an hour to go. So far… they still haven’t all caught on they’ve been getting killed off.

@reedracer Reats don’t fry in the kitchen, brains don’t burn on the grill#HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Where did the one man rock band dude go?

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror “You hit me like I murdered your fucking mother or something!” line of the night.

@Jasmine_Galan Cameras on Michael Myers is there. Cameras off. Cameras back on Michael Myers is gone and everyone is cool. Seems Legit #HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa #HashtagHorror Busta’s in it for da millions of dollars!

@MrsZigglesworth This is what happens when a musical career fails. This.. or Brooke Hogan in the Knockouts Division. #HashtagHorror

@Kristoffrable Woah! Mike Meyers is Crush from old school WWF? Fucking-A I didn’t know that! #HashtagHorror

@Jasmine_Galan And again…Fake Michael Myers went off in the kitchen, but they now think he is upstairs. Am I missing something? #HashtagHorror

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror You know you’re screwed when the music major is the tough one.

@Kristoffrable “You like sushi mother fucker” is not a line I yell out when trying to kill someone. #HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror BITCH GET OUT DA ROOM!!

@BrooklynBrawla lol she’s john cena. he can’t see her. #HashtagHorror

@reedracer Michael! She’s on the roof! #HashtagHorror

 

Less than 15 minutes to go and these two somehow, despite looking for the murderer, were unable to hear him come into the room. It’s not like he doesn’t slowly clomp everywhere he’s going.

@JoeBewick If I was Rhymes, I would-a been forced to… ‘Busta Move’.#CSIScream #HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Michael gets in and out the house with ease where as nobody else can get out!

@Jasmine_Galan Ooooohhhhh he looks PISSED #HashtagHorror

@Kristoffrable Clearly there is a way out in the basement. Well I don’t know about that, but there is a torture chamber. #HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa #HashtagHorror How did the ginger miss that ladder first time around?

@Kristoffrable Wow, how long ago did they call the cops and still haven’t showed up? Great police force. Effective as the people in Rambo#HashtagHorror

@reedracer I never had a chainsaw start first pull. Sure don’t make ’em like they used too. #HashtagHorror

@JoeBewick And this one’s for Jesus, and this one’s for Churchill, and this one’s for Malcolm X… #HashtagHorror

@BrooklynBrawla a puddle of blood conducts electricity? #DaMoreYouKnow#HashtagHorror

@TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror That was… *long pause* ballsy.

@MrsZigglesworth When the movie was made Myers would have been 50. He clearly works out. #HashtagHorror

@Jasmine_Galan Ahh the classic “sit up like nothing affects me” Was Undertaker another stunt double? #HashtagHorror

@JoeBewick What do we think Busta’s favourite word is? #HashtagHorror

@reedracer I felt that! ‘lectricity. #HashtagHorror

@Jasmine_Galan  ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT! Oh no he’s just carrying her to safety… damn #HashtagHorror

@FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Why is a firemen loading the stretcher instead of a paramedic? Guess the EMT’s said fuck that after H20.

@MrsZigglesworth Cue Triple H: Does he have a pulse? #HashtagHorror