So, in case everyone here doesn’t know, It takes a lot to make me blush.  In turn it also means I am fairly blunt and not afraid to talk about taboo subjects or squeamish things.  Here is your warning if you can’t handle the aforementioned things: STOP READING NOW.

Okay, now that we got that out of the way.

We’re going to discuss the Uterus.  And to a degree, mine.

See, I happen to think my uterus, is well mine.  And no one else’s.  Not my doctors.  Not the Govermnment.  Not the individuals I sleep with.  MINE.  Because of this I tend to get worked up about issues having to do with the uterus.  You’ve read it here before, that I am pro-choice, that I believe that EVERY woman is capable of making the correct reproduction health choices for her.  Case closed.

So today I went to my OB-GYN, new for me since I have ever only seen my general practitioner for my yearly physicals.  See, I have been having problems for almost a year now.  Bleeding outside of my period, severe abdominal pain and cramping at any given time, and abdominal pressure.  After multiple changes of my birth control and one very exciting ER visit last month I FINALLY got referred.

My doctor is a lovely middle eastern woman who seemed to listen to me more then most of the doctors so far had.  That was until I muttered these words “I want an IUD”.  For those of you who don’t know what this is, and IUD is birth control for either 5 or 10 years that is inserted into your uterus to prevent pregnancy.  It is less common for doctors to want to give it to women without children because the uterus has not been stretched out, and there carries a slightly higher risk of infertility and infection because of this.

When I said I wanted an IUD she looked shocked, saying “Why would you do that?  You’re a lovely woman, why wouldn’t you want children?”  And you know, this question gets tiring, and I can’t help but wonder how much men get the same thing.  So I answered with a sensible “I just don’t.  I’ve known since I was 15 that I wouldn’t be a good mother, I don’t want to be a mother” when what I really want to yell at the top of my lungs is “I JUST DON’T FUCKING WANT KIDS, OK?  WHY DO I NEED A REASON?!”  And this is where my major problem lies.

If I wanted to have 20 children like the Duggar family on TV no one would really say a stinking thing.  I am a live and let live kind of person, so if the Duggars (or you, or whomever) want to have a large family then GO FOR IT.  But why does a woman who chooses NOT to have children have to be grilled about it?  Im still a woman, not having children doesn’t change that.  The last doc I went to about an IUD said that I would need a psychiatric evaluation before I could be considered.  SERIOUSLY?  I need to be evaluated by a shrink because I don’t want to forever alter my life?

It come down to this: I am selfish.  I like my life exactly as it is.   I know there’s joy and love being a mother, but I just don’t want it.  I know it sounds insane to those of you who are Moms but I’d much rather take my meager paycheck and spend it on scarves, wine, shoes, handbags, makeup and DVDs with hot men in them.  I’m like the crazy inebriated Aunt everyone loves who buys them weird things and has lots of cats.  Or at least I will be.  And I figure if I hit 40 and all the sudden a baby-germ attacks me like the plague I will just adopt.

I don’t worry about passing on my genetics…have you met my family?  I have FIVE nephews, our genetic line is very secure.  And work hard to pass on bad habits, sarcasm, and the occasional inadvertent swear word to them.  I pass on my talent to my students.  And I can still come home every night, sit around in my underwear, watch ‘True Blood’ and drink a gallon, errr, I mean GLASS of wine.

I dislike getting the third degree EVERY SINGLE TIME I talk to a doctor about an IUD.  I finally looked at my doctor today and said “They’re easy to take out, right?” and she said yes.  Then she said they only give them to people in monogamous relationships.  Yes, because an IUD helps against STDs (NOT!) and if a woman has one it is going to make her very promiscuous.  Shit, I should have gotten an IUD loooooooooooong ago!  I can imagine guys are going to look at me a say, “Hey there girl, good looking IUD there, wanna fuck?”  If only!

Seriously though, what is it anyone’s business but mine if I want to have long term contraception (besides the pill) ?  If she was against the idea religiously then she needs to refer me onto another doctor (which could be since she was clearly a bit displeased that I was 31 and unmarried, a fact she asked me twice).  If I wanted to have my tubes tied I should be able to.  Hell, if I wanted to have a hysterectomy then I shouldn’t have to battle for it as my friend, Michelle did after YEARS of severe medical complications.  Read her (rather amusing) blog at: http://doesthishysterectomymakemelookfat.com/

This is MY BODY, and it is MY CHOICE how to live in it.