Comic Book Finishing Moves.

WWF Wrestling Super Heroes VHS

 

The other day, Niel Jacoby and I were coming up with the perfect wrestling finisher for various super heroes.  For those of you who read this blog and are not wrestling fans (and I’m well aware there are many of you) let me explain finishing moves.  Every wrestler has a move that is “theirs”.  This is the move that he/she will hit at the end of the match ensuring their win.  The crowd becomes excited, because they know the signature move means victory is near.  Everyone within one wrestling company has their own, and no one can share.  Therefore, some are cooler than others but they are all dramatic.

As fans of both comic books and wrestling, the cross over idea was quite easy.  Super heroes and villains need finishing moves as well.  If you opened up the latest issue of Superman and saw him gearing up for that final hit, couldn’t it be even more exciting?  Even better, should the finisher be hit and someone comes back from it, it makes that adversary look that much stronger.

So who do we have?

We’ll start out direct from Twitter:

Niel is in quotes.  Follow him on Twitter:  https://twitter.com/#!/NielJacoby

I picked a Winter Soldier cover in my top comic book covers of the week post just because of a monkey on the cover.  Niel responded with

The only way that Winter Soldier cover can end in a good way is if he somehow manages to land a Zig Zag on Red Ghost.

I’m discovering the joy that is monkeys in comics at a late age. And super hero fights should have more wrestling moves.

Frankenstein’s Monster all putting all sorts of unearthly beasties in the YES Lock.

I imagine Hank Pym would use the Crippler Crossface.  (That’s right.  Only a couple of lines in this and I already go dark with it.  Best to take the joke off the table early.  Then we can all move on and enjoy the banter without the horrible joke hanging overhead like the pun of Damocles. )

Now I’m trying to think of a character that would use that SPIT HAND thing Lord Tensai does.

And of course Hal Jordan uses the 5 Knuckle Shuffle.

Daredevil for Lord Tensai. Goes to Japan to learn this trick. Its taught to him by… The Hand.

OOOOOOOOOOOOH! And Kingpin superplexes dudes so hard the floor is absolutely demolished. World’s Strongest Slam indeed.

Spider-Man with a Shooting star Press. Captain America with the sleeper. Yeah i might have to write this.

Just remember: If you see somebody corpsing, send for the Deadman!

The tough part is, who would hit a shitty chokeslam like Kane’s from Raw?

hmm. That’s a toughie.

 

Part of that horrible choke slam is figuring out what character could screw up a move that bad.  Kane can execute the move just fine, but when Big Show neither goes up nor sells the move in any way, it looks like crap.  Show slowly falls backwards and that is all.  He even evades any harm to himself in taking the move in this way.  My mind reaches for a character who could be against someone large and cause the right sequence of events to mess up the move.  In this scenario, Mojo is Kane and Big Show is Longshot.

More suggestions:

Iron Fist hits Low Ki’s Warriors Way.

Hulk with an F5.

Luke Cage with Big Show’s Knockout Punch.

I see Batman using the DDT.  A devastating move that can be pulled out of no where.  Great potential for serious injury, maybe even paralysis, but not death.

Goldberg’s Spear/Jackhammer combo needs to go to a character just like him.  Someone who was built up to be greater than any one else who came before.  Then, rather quickly, we all discovered the limitations.  People started to protect him.  Crazy things were done to spice up the character.  In the end, he disappears and we all have a little bit of nostalgia for the short time he was here, but we don’t actually want him back under any means.  These moves need to go to… the Sentry.

Shang Chi hits Sweet Chin Music.

I’m struggling to find a character who fits with the Ace Crusher.  The Stone Cold Stunner.  The Diamond Cutter.  The RKO.  Its all the same move, but with variations.  Who can hit this?  Its a move that can come at any time, on any opponent.  Suggestions?

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